Friday 5 June 2015

First date food

A cold winter's evening has followed a meh kind of day. Motivation to do anything outside the confines of my comfy recliner is low. Dinner time has come and gone. On rare occasions such as these, cheap and cheerful comfort food of the takeaway variety is acceptable. Kebabs were ordered and a quick "you drive by while I run in and pick up dinner" plan was executed before returning back to our trusty heater.

I do like doner kebabs, but they're incredibly messy to eat, especially once they start falling apart after a few bites and get even messier towards the end when all the sauce drips out, usually on clothing or your face or both.

"This is not first date food," we agree each time, as I get up to eat the last of my kebab over the kitchen sink. The thing is, we can safely eat kebabs in front of each other; it's been years now. But it's not usually the best way to make a good impression on someone.

Years ago after returning from a trip to Italy, someone wanted to help me recreate the magic by taking me to a local Italian restaurant. He liked the look of the spaghetti and meatballs on the menu but was too scared to order and eat it in front of an Italiana. Schema!

There are lists, of course. Some good places to start are 16 messy foods that will make you look like a slob no matter whatten foods too messy for public consumption and foods that no-one can eat gracefully (although some of these are incredibly yummy and lots of fun). Still, nothing quite beats first hand experience with messy food.

Here's my list of non-first date food:
  • Kebabs
  • Ribs of any description, especially when covered in sticky sauce
  • Wings (see above)
  • Small chicken drumsticks
  • Pork crackling
  • Corn on the cob dripping with melted butter
  • Chocolate eclairs, raspberry buns or cream donuts overfilled with cream
  • Seafood that requires shucking to get the good bits out
  • Anything requiring the use of chopsticks unless you have this skill mastered.
What would you add to the non-first date food list?

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