Last year, a friend's partner treated three of us to a pampering and high tea session. Most of it was fantastic, but there were a couple of moments when things got uncomfortable. At the time, I was in the middle of ongoing treatment for a damaged disc in my back and my osteopath had given strict instructions for me to pass on to the masseuse about I'd need during the course of a massage. I passed these instructions on and they were agreed to, then promptly ignored. I wriggled and squirmed throughout my massage but couldn't let myself speak up; it was so peaceful and quiet, and maybe they were just about to turn me like they were supposed to and I'd only annoy them by pushing the situation? Nope, no change. The session finished with a copper foot bath consisting of Earl Grey tea leaves floating in extremely hot water. (It's supposed to be good for you. Hmm.) Two of us asked for some cooler water to be added to the mix as we couldn't cope with the heat. We were informed that "that temperature is correct" and effectively dismissed, leaving us to grin and bear it for fear of being told off again. So why couldn't we just insist that we were about to be scalded, instead of just keeping quiet and trying to endure it?
A South African colleague was telling about someone she knew in her homeland who was a 'serial complainer'. She had a whole room full of compensation and apology products from companies she had complained to about almost everything. It seemed to work for her. I could think of nothing more uncomfortable.
We need to fire our cleaner. We just don't know how to do it. Do we approach the cleaner in the first instance and give her yet another 'second chance'? Do we go directly to the company and complain, effectively undermining her or 'dobbing her in'? We have reluctantly paid her each fortnight (she is quick to ring up the very next day if her money hasn't come through, even if we are out too late to transfer the payment for that working day) but we’re hesitant to pay her for yesterday's dreadful job. Still, she was there for two hours 'working' in our home, even if she missed lots of things.
I think that my sweetie should fire her as the booking is under his name, but he thinks I should do it as I'm the one who leaves out the cleaning list for her and has spoken to her more. Neither of us are good at rocking the boat but something needs to happen. (I'm determined it will be him.) It's all very well to say we should just be assertive and deal with the situation, but who actually find this easy to do? Does anyone actually ever feel good about complaining or speaking up?