Pineapple lump cupcakes

Pineapple lumps are some of my favourite lollies. The chocolate pineapple combination makes it scarily easy to polish off a pack before you know it. Remember this ad? It's not just me who thinks they are good.



With pineapple lumps in the pantry and baking to do today, I thought about how I could combine these two things and modified a recipe for pineapple and coconut cupcakes. The result was 24 delicious pineapple cupcakes topped with chocolate frosting and, of course, crowned with a heavenly pineapple lump.

Pineapple lump cupcakes

Ingredients

• 240 g plain flour
• 280 g sugar
• 3 t baking powder
• 1/2 t salt
• 80 g butter, softened
• 240 ml milk
• 1 t vanilla essence
• 2 eggs
• 300 g crushed pineapple, drained (1 x 440 g tin)

Method

1. Preheat oven to 170°C.
2. Line two 12-hole muffin tins with cupcake papers.
3. Using the paddle attachment of your mixer, mix the flour, sugar, baking powder, salt and butter on slow speed until reaching a sandy consistency and everything is combined.
4. Mix the milk and vanilla together in a measuring cup. Pour into the flour mixture on medium speed until well combined.
5. Add eggs one at a time and mix well, scraping down the side of the bowl with a spatula in between additions.
6. Fold in the crushed pineapple with a spatula. The mixture will be wet and sloppy.
7. Fill the cupcake cases until two-thirds full. Using an ice cream scoops helps spread the mixture evenly.
8. Bake for 25 minutes or until the cupcakes bounce back when touched and an inserted skewer comes out clean. Leave to cool in the tray for five minutes before turning out onto a wire rack to cool completely.

Chocolate buttercream

Ingredients

• 250 g unsalted butter, softened
• 250 g icing sugar, sifted
• 30 ml tepid water
• 20 g cocoa, sifted to remove lumps

Method

1. Beat the butter and sugar on high speed using the paddle attachment until smooth and creamy.
2. Add water and mix to combine.
3. Add cocoa and mix until smooth.

Pipe or frost the cupcakes when cool, then top with a pineapple lump.

Pineapple lump cupcakes

Piña colada cupcakes

You can vary this recipe to make piña colada cupcakes.

• Replace milk with coconut milk.
• Replace vanilla essence with rum.
• Frost with vanilla buttercream and sprinkle with desiccated coconut to decorate.

Jet plane lollies

Ahh, jet plane lollies. These firm packages of sugar and food colouring have a soft spot in many grown-ups' hearts. My nonna would bring jet plane lollies when she came to stay with us during winter weekends and I've looked at them through a nostalgic lens ever since.

Jet planes have out-survived many iconic kiwi lollies that bit the dust in recent years. Now, I don't know where jet planes originated from but, given that the colours and flavour profiles are the same as wine gums, they may well have come from the UK and migrated to the colonies over time. I'm glad they did.

Everyone has a preference - and everyone is right (of course). I had quite an in-depth conversation with a six-year-old nephew on a camping trip recently about which jet planes were the best. It turns out that he and I have similar tastes. We like white, yellow and green jet planes when others make a beeline for red or purple. We've both been told that white jet planes have no flavour at all - but we know that they do and it's our favourite. In just six short years, he has heard all the same jet plane stories as me:

"I like the red and purple ones but not the green ones."
"Euw, green and white ones are horrible! They don't taste of anything!"
"I can taste the yellow and orange ones anywhere."
"Of course I know which ones are which. They're not all the same flavour."

We had a similar conversation in the office yesterday when a packet of jet planes appeared after a meeting. There was only one way to solve this: blind taste testing. Jet planes of each colour were cut into small bites which were presented one at a time to those of us brave enough to put our taste buds on the line. A score card was kept and the results collated.

It turns out there is a difference in flavours - but not as we expected. Our empirical research, with a sample size of four, showed that those who were most confident about their jet plane palette were actually the least competent at identifying them. We all interchanged yellow and red, but only two of us could correctly identify four out of six (white, green, purple and orange). One person scored two out of six and the most confident managed a measly total of one correct - and that was probably a guess.

We agreed that next time we should repeat the experiment with wine gums or jelly beans or both - all in the name of research, of course.

Toffee milks

Toffee milks
sold unwrapped in dairies

Here's a blast from the past. Who remembers toffee milks? These were staple lollies growing up in New Zealand in the 80s. You'd buy them individually at the dairy for 10 cents and they sat in an open box before being wrapped in a paper bag that didn't quite cover the top, much like the original peanut slabs.

Back when you could buy 1 cent lollies, a 20 cent mixture provided abundant treats and a 50 cent mixture could last for days, spending 10 cents of your meagre pocket money on a single toffee milk was a sizable investment  but one that was entirely worth it. These chocolate covered toffees were notorious for numbing teeth if you bit directly into them but would soften in your mouth and last for ages if you did it just right.

Toffee milks had other uses, too. At our school, they were great gambling currency for knucklebone competitions. This craze swept our school (around the same time as dodgeball, elastics and skipping) in the mid-80s, so much so that the school had to relax its "play outside at lunch time" rules and gave us one classroom with carpet to play in each day. I guess they figured it was better than us all scraping our fingers trying to play outside on concrete.

We would play each other for toffee milks and you could only start a game if you could prove you had a toffee milk to give the winner if you lost the 1-1 bout. A few people tried promising IOUs; sometimes these were a safe bet as they often meant the competitor wasn't very good so you were sure to win but not always guaranteed they'd front up with your prize. I'm quite proud to say that I was really good at knucklebones and, along with one other girl, regularly accumulated a stash of toffee milks I had won in the pocket of my school uniform. Between us, we did pretty well ... and I was thrilled to beat her in a one-off Champion of Champions match.

The other day, a colleague and I spied a jar of toffee milks on the counter at Superfino. We talked about how much we'd loved toffee milks as kids, ordered our coffees and I rushed back to work for a meeting. Shortly afterwards, I found a toffee milk waiting on my desk. Just like that I was taken back to 1985 when I always had a packet of knucklebones ready to go in one pocket of my school uniform and a bag of toffee milks in the other! Yes, Whittaker's toffee milks easily make it onto the list of #myfavouritethings.

Taking it to the streets

I'm not much of an official protester; I prefer to moan to my nearest and dearest, rather than do something decisive and take action. Living in Wellington, and working quite close to Parliament for several years, protests and rallies were happening every time do-gooders hatched half-baked plans over a drink or three. I was walking down Lambton Quay with a friend one lunchtime and he noticed the closed lanes on the other side of the road, commenting (with rolled eyes), "who's protesting this time?". Turns out it was the Victoria University of Wellington graduation parade ... doh!

One would think that, with an election so close at hand, that political protests, demonstrations and rallies would be hitting the headlines. However, once again, the nation is getting ready for a planned protest, and this time it's for a cause I support.

The Sugar Liberation Army plans to protest tomorrow outside the Cadbury's Dunedin premises to protest the chopping of Snifters, Sparkles and Tangy Fruits, favourites of movie-goers for decades. Concerned residents will stage Operation Tang Protest at 5:30pm. A spokesperson for the group says, "in a world of financial uncertainty and economic crisis, we turn to nostalgia for small comforts". They go on to say that, "Cadbury-Schweppes Pty Ltd is denying everyday New Zealanders the sweet, confectionary nostalgia of their forefathers". Hear, hear!

Stand strong, SLA - the nation depends on you to save these fledgling kiwi icons. Kia kaha!

Farewelling a kiwi icon

There's a general election coming up in New Zealand in November, but there seems to be an incredible apathy about the start of the political campaigns, which so far predominantly consist of personal mudslinging and very little to do with policy or substance at all.

One issue has got the country up and agitated though. Yesterday, it was announced that Cadbury Schweppes would stop producing Pascall Snifters, Tangy Fruits, and Sparkles due to falling demand. The shocked reaction from outraged New Zealanders at the removal of a piece of their collective childhoods was immediate. How will going to movies ever be the same without the clink of tangy fruits in their plastic containers, or the rustle of snifters bags. I didn't realise that sparkles were still available, but remember the rectangular tubes of square boiled lollies in red, orange, yellow, and green from when I was a child. Whatever next - no more jaffas??

Of the three, I have fond memories of sparkles, and was only very rarely allowed to buy tangy fruits (usually to share with my brother at the movies), but will always have a soft spot for snifters.

And so the outrage was instant. The Twitterers were tweeting. Facebook groups such as Save the Tangy Fruits, Snifters and Sparkles Group, Safe the Snifters and Bring Back Snifters popped up instantly. Polls appeared. Will they have any effect? Only time will tell.

Tales from a landlord

And now for an episode from Tales from a Landlord ...

Over the weekend, a washing machine in an upstairs flat decided to overflow and leak through to the downstairs flat. Imagining scenes from Noah's Ark, I was relieved to see that the damage was relatively minor, but the washing machine was dead. A quick online/phone order and the new one would be delivered to the flat on Thursday. The news got even better - the tenant wanted to be home for the delivery, saving me taking a half-day's leave to meet the installers. Great!

ETA: 1-1:30 pm.
Time of distressed phone call from tenant: 2:40 pm.
Time of repeat call from tenant to report installation complete: 3:30 pm.

What actually happened? The installers had originally gone to an address in Lower Hutt, instead of Mt Victoria in Wellington (15km difference), but the appliance store was insistent that it had now been delivered. Apparently some guy called Andy (correct name) had signed for the washing machine and it was installed ... turns out that "some guy called Andy" was actually at the backpackers' next door to my flat, signed for a random washing machine delivery, somehow found a space with pipes and wiring to be installed, and accepted a free washing machine, without question!!

A bottle of wine and a packet of Minties ("it's moments like these") is now on its way to my lovely tenant.

Two videos come to mind:






Yup, "it's moments like these you need Minties".

Liquorice, but without the liquorice

I love the look of liquorice allsorts. Those colourful, sweet slabs separating strips of deep black look really appealing. Deliciously tempting ... right? No, I'm not fooled by their outward appearance. Actually, it's the liquorice I hate. I've tried to like it and even kidded myself that I couldn't taste it that well if I concentrated on the sweet stuff wrapped around it, but it hasn't worked.

I love red liquorice, though. At certain times, I crave red liquorice like you wouldn't believe. While I rarely indulge, I've discovered something in recent months which could possibly threaten my restraint: red liquorice allsorts. Omg, could there be a more perfect food? (Apart from cheese, chocolate, or cashew nuts??)

Pascall have come up with the goods with their Fruit Allsorts. If I don't watch out, they could easily become my downfall. But, they're fruit, so they must be good for you ... right? ;-)