When words are too much effort

My friend sent me this book two Christmases ago:
She told me to display it prominently on my desk at work, choose a saying, and on days when words are just too much effort to deflect a stupid comment or unreasonable request, simply point and the person standing by my desk would soon get the message. She was right; we had great fun choosing a new saying each day and, although I never had to use it in exactly the way it was intended, several colleagues went out and purchased copies for themselves.

These books are a great mixture of 1950s and 60s images used in advertising, coupled with a clever quip from Ed Polish. There are fridge magnets, coffee mugs, key rings, greeting cards, and a whole range of memorabilia to go with, but for all means and purposes, I love my 'bitch book', as it came to be known. Even though I work from home now, it still comes in handy from time to time.

Here's a selection of other quips and quotes that I've found, some of which feature in this book and others from different sources. Take them how you will.